Posted in Breathing under water

The rescue…

“Those who flow as life flows know they need no other force.”― Lao Tzu

I could no longer swim against the current, I had grown weary.
So, I let the tide take me way out to sea, and in that moment of near drowning
you held out your hand.
You found me afloat in the darkness, unable to find my way back,
I had almost lost the battle.
I wanted to drown, to be suffocated, to end the misery,
but in knowing I was not alone, I surrendered.
I began to move slowly, parallel to the shore.
I regained my strength.
There was no more struggle, just a serenity of senses in very deep waters,
“You can’t fight the waves,” a still small voice said, “rather enlist them in your struggle.”
So I let all that is within me flow with the movement of the water,
and the waves worked for me, as they brought me gently back to shore.

…..

I am always thankful to those who reach out a hand of friendship
when I am in the midst of struggle, no matter how tiny the voice.
It’s like a life-line back to the shore, a beacon of light guiding me out of self-pity..
Never underestimate the power of love, kindness and friendship..

Posted in Breathing under water

Morning…

“We live between the act of awakening and the act of surrender. Each morning, we awaken to the light and the invitation to a new day in the world of time; each night, we surrender to the dark to be taken to play in the world of dreams where time is no more.”
― John O’Donohue, Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom

I’ve dug deep trenches of sadness,
buried myself way down,
and as the quagmire thickened
I almost drowned…

a hostage to my sorrow
no movement on my lips,
in the deadliest of moments, I was miserably transfixed!

and the darkness
enclosed me
in a mausoleum of tears,
I begged to never awaken
just to quietly disappear.

and with patience
I was gathered,
my senses cleared in the light,
seeing love all around me
kindness gave me back my sight!

the years have gently softened me,
though the wound still bleeds,
carved out
in remembrance,
like rivulets on my cheeks.

Sometimes I awaken
to sadness,
then light to enters in,
praying
with each heartbeat,
grace touches my skin…

And love always finds me, bringing me back to life
in the blessings of each morning,
that are fluently divine….

Photo by Nicholas Leonard Art
©AllysoAlly2021

Posted in Breathing under water

I’m written into the script…

wild flowers in the gardenThese words don’t belong to me,
the song isn’t mine,
I’ve tried to make sense of it,
but I read like a whine…

The tune is damaged,
it’s garbled at best,
my heart has been shattered,
how can I invest?

The future doesn’t know me
though I’m written
into the script,
the resurgence of sorrow
is hard to predict…

So I’ll face the music,
hold onto the wire,
and if they receive me,
I will blend with the choir…

There’s safety
in the shadows
hiding me from view,
in the sweetness of oblivion
in a tangle of hues…

My melody is outnumbered,
wounds will not heal,
but this is the symphony
of me being real…

I’ll quietly rehearse,
and give movement
to the mime,
enroll in the precepts
that teach humans to shine…

but if my strength vanishes,
and I’m caught off-key,
please show me
the cadence
of your humanity…

like wildflowers
in the garden,
almost hidden
from sight,
I bravely reach up,
and transcend
into light…

©AllysoAlly2020

Posted in Breathing under water

Masked ball…

acquiese

Are we masked
revelers
crashing through time,
trying to make sense
of party lines?

Unable to touch
or even embrace,
hardly breathing,
our wildness erased…

Cautioned by fear,
longing to be set free,
acquiescing to
this threat
like detainees…

Who planned this rip
in the fabric of time,
is this the new normal,
and have we resigned?
to strange masquerades
infiltrating earth,
all dressed
for the occasion,
with only whispers of mirth…

©AllysoAlly2020

Posted in Breathing under water

The unsaid…

“The breezes at dawn have secrets to tell you
Don’t go back to sleep!”― Rumi

secrets

Some things remain unsaid
but words have resonance,
they echo in heart chambers,
they wake us before dawn
and desire articulation…

the pain needs to be exsanguinated
however deadly it may seem!

there’s a brutal truth that lies deep
in the bosom of heartache
it festers
if left
it longs to be known
to be expunged
from its self-made gallows…

and yet there’s fear
regret
shame
in this witches’ brew
this potion
this spell of deceit
that grew up in us…

How do we untangle the words and let them come forth without lacerating ourselves and others in the process?…

©AllysoAlly2020

Posted in Breathing under water, courage, Dreaming while awake

Keep the light on…

“We shall meet in the place where there is no darkness.”
― George Orwell

No entry

Deserted beaches,
silent halls,
moods translated
by talking walls…

overcrowded messages
are caught on zoom,
while protestations
wordlessly fume…

Wishes float into thin air,
skeptics chafe
on garbled prayers…

Outdoor dreaming
is all but shut,
folksy monotones
are in a rut…

Muted citizens
hideaway,
while hungry queuers digest dismay…

baited breath
of the unsaid,
lies are truth,
and truth is dead…

On the other side of this dystopian state,
is a unity of consciousness we must create…

©AllysoAlly2020

Posted in Breathing under water

Sacred Journeys…

journey with grief

It’s like a freight train
in the darkness
hitting me at full speed…

Awareness
in that moment,
a wound
that has to bleed…

It’s a fearful obsession,
an emptiness within,
as well as
a deep knowing,
it’s goose bumps
on my skin…

It’s the voice
of a tormentor
saying that he’s gone,
it only lasts
a second,
it’s the mystical beyond…

It’s unexplainable visits
when breathing in light,
it’s a deep knowing
that gets me
through the night…

It’s rainbows
boldly stretched
across azure skies,
it’s a change of direction,
unraveling the lies…

It’s a gentle banishment
of archaic beliefs,
a supernatural feeling,
a glorious release…

It’s a slow awakening
expanding the mind,
It’s everlasting kindness,
faith in the Divine…

It’s a visceral knowing
that he watches
over me,
It’s a sacred journey
A loving reverie…

©AllysoAlly2020

Posted in Breathing under water

Cosmic Dance…

art by l muri

I touched
warm waters,
my heart
in my hand…
wading in the shallows
I felt earth expand…

In sacred moments,
you are everywhere,
a cosmic dancer,
without a care..

and waters lapped
over my broken heart,
kissed
with emotion…
I became a part
of all
that was and ever shall be
a swimmer
in a supernatural sea…

Art by L. Muri…
©AllysoAlly2019

Posted in Breathing under water

River…

 

river

I went down
to the river
to rewrite my vows,
merging
with creation
beneath hallowed boughs…

I went there
to wash
my misgivings
away,
the sweet waters flowed
into sentient spray…

And in the mists
of consuming
repose,
way down
in the shadows
my heart
was exposed…

In rivers
of mourning
I consented to the pain,
beneath
living waters
I will drink joy again…

©AllysoAlly2019