Sleep-walking…

are we just shadows
building an eternity
of dreams,
forgetting what it means
to be holy?

seeing only in black and white,
blown back and forth
by chaotic winds,
losing our grip on hope
as we sleep-walk
away from love!

©AllysoAlly2021

Reflected light…

“We all shine on…like the moon and the stars and the sun…we all shine on…come on and on and on…”
― john Lennon

The moon awoke me
in delicate light,
from restless dreams
and watchful night.

her generous presence
lit up my room,
unbalanced shadows
were exhumed.

Darkness had recruited me to stay awake,
to gather me into
tones opaque!

Then her luminescence
brushed
across my bed,
throwing light  
on what is unsaid,
reminding me
that hers
is merely
reflected light,
that unveils her glory
and embodies the night…

©AllysoAlly2021

Belonging…

“I should have told you
audibly

that I felt dead inside,
the nights were long
and I tried so hard to hide…

But instead, I kept the wound
tight against my chest,
fragmenting quietly
I was secretly depressed…

And you walked through my consciousness
living your best life,
while I lay bedraggled
hardly alive…

and I wondered if you noticed
my labored breath,
my sorrowful look
my fellowship with death…

But the walls couldn’t hide me,
the floors wouldn’t hold,
I needed the benevolence of a loving fold…

where questions don’t need answers
and fears go unscreened,
a place of belonging where joy intervenes”….

…………………

“You know

those sanctuaries

where you tiptoe barefoot,

where your

core resonance

is fully understood?

and the ground

feels the vibration

and stride of your walk,

the air knows

the inflection

and mood

of your talk…

it’s a setting

where the breeze

touches

the curve of your form,

and sunlight reminds you

of everlasting warmth…

where shadows

follow you

out of the gloom,

and you breathe

the intensity

of holy perfume…

and up above you

are windows

to heaven,

pouring down on you

untold blessings”…

©AllysoAlly2020

The bogeyman…

The bogeyman of the night
called me up,
my sweet dreams
he conspired
to interrupt…

he sank, uneasy in my head,
as I grew heavy on my bed…

Uninvited
he roused an ancient fear,
my fragile dreams
disappeared!

I allowed myself to enter in, to the sound of his unholy din…

at break of day
the curse diffused,
and dawn’s blessings changed the mood…

I knew full well he would call again,
bad news had filtered
through my brain…

from ground zero where dread accrued
I must stock up on gratitude…

©AllysoAlly2020

Watershed moments…

“We sense that ‘normal’ isn’t coming back, that we are being born into a new normal: a new kind of society, a new relationship to the earth, a new experience of being human.”
― Charles Eisenstein

My dreams dissolved
into thin air,
I groped the heaviness
of watchful prayers…
in the darkness
I bolted from sleep
to shed the misery
of a shadowy creep…

I’d felt the drone
of human dismay,
the press release with nothing good to say,
conditioned by my worldly flesh
in disturbed scenarios
I’d become enmeshed…

I searched the horizon for hosts of light
to rescue me on this frightened night

Against the blackness
of bejeweled skies
I felt the gravity of human sighs,
I saw the firmament
abounding with life
a million orbs
who conceived delight…

in narratives of the cold night air,
I sensed impressions of beings who care…

I stroked the dog,
drank my tea,
I wondered what had become of me?

Then I descended
into a sleepy haze,
having gained resemblance of inward praise…

the recognition
that I had been caught
in the dull ache
of toxic thoughts…

swamped by the murkiness of an ominous threat
these watershed moments
I never forget….

I felt the call…

“You are the root of heaven, the morning star, the bright moon,
the house of endless Love.”
― Rumi

The trees were laughing
the moon was out,
I felt the call
on distant mount…

prayers of calvary,
that came before,
universal tongues,
a lover’s encore…

the peaceful meadows
and fields
were bright,
a blessed calling,
that reignites
this fragile flesh
on common grounds,
announcing that peace
is all around… 

with every breath
we each belong
to the symphonies
of cosmic songs…

the wounded healer
who wore
this form,
stands beside us
through every storm…

©AllysoAlly2020

Watching…

When you watch me,
notice the nuance
of my breath…
When you see me,
feel the brutality of death…

For I am unusual,
a body without a creed…
I am the hope,
that joy
will intercede…

And you look at me
with pity in your eyes,
you fake a smile
an unwanted disguise…

For, I see you,
in the fabric of this book,
I’m a family
of strangers
overlooked…

But I don’t mind,
for there’s life on other worlds…
I’ll meet you there,
where love speaks not in words…

and I feel
a sadness
beneath my breath,
yet I’ve understood
the realm that knows not death!

©AllysoAlly2020

Living in the in-between…

Let’s live in the in-between,
in the spaces unseen…
Where nightbirds
lull us back to sleep,
and hearts immerse
in silver streams…

In the ambiance
of an overflow,
implanted with peace
we gladly grow,
and become
intimate
with translucent light,
expressed
in dreams
throughout the night…

we will hold
to eternal grace
look fear squarely
in the face…
and live in the in-betweens
where love’s harvest
is increased,
where fairies dance
and moonbeams shine,
and all life needs
is to take the time…

to breathe in
mystical sights…
an abundance
of faith will suffice…
living in the in-betweens,
where hope
really intervenes…
And when
we lay
our form
to rest,
in connection
we are truly blessed…

Art by Helke…
©AllysoAlly2019

Keeping watch while I’m asleep…

“You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you still remember dreaming? That’s where I’ll always love you. That’s where I’ll be waiting.”
― James V. Hart, Hook

We have looked
for them
in places
between dreaming
and awake…

Our senses
were dulled
by the stories
we made up in our heads…

now we are rewriting
the narrative,
opening the heart
of lucid  vision,
until we are brave enough
to say it out loud
to strangers
to nay-sayers
to those who stole our dreams…

we will tell the stories
of courage
in human form,
and when the least of us
speaks
it will sound like
other-worldly dialects…

we will imagine our way,
out of the darkness
of our minds,
and become seers,
who straddle this world
and the next…

sages
from earthly realms,
time travelers,
agents
of the mystical,
existing in our dreams…
shamans of another time…

©AllysoAlly2019

 

At times…

At times I feel
the heaviness
of your physical absence,
and the intensity
ruptures
my already fragile heart…

Leaden tears spill
in echo chambers,
clanging me into wakefulness…

Impassioned conversations
flood my imagination
on anguished nights,
and I wonder
if I’m forgiven for my part in all of this?
The words keep
turning over,
repeating,
tormenting,
flushing through my brain
wounding me with imputation…

“what could I have done better?”

Just hollow words
bouncing off stars
trying to find their way to you,
translated
they bear the resemblance
of confessions…
invocations
desiring expression,
in a morass of spewed out grief…

And I hear you say, almost out loud…
“Mom, you did everything right, I was never meant to stay!”

and I return to the arms of Morpheus…

©Ally2019