Posted in Breathing under water

The way out…

“The Way Out Is Through”
― Mark Epstein, The Trauma of Everyday Life

the way out

I’m lagging behind
dragging my feet.
I’m incomplete.

A desolate
an empty space.
I wake in the morning to imprint your face.

When emptiness speaks,
my heartache rings,
on own my heartstrings!

I step into shadows,
again I am dense.
Weighed down
by sorrow,
the chasm

Acquiescing to pain,
tears must flow,
by reflections
of liquid woe…

I forage for light,
some kind of relief.
I’m hemorrhaging out
and swimming
in grief!

There’s no way around.
I must go through,
immersed in heartache,
I’m renewed!



Posted in Me in real life

I promise I’m not afraid!


When ghosts and goblins come out
I promise
I’m not afraid,
my harrowing demeanor
is anything
but cliché.
I’m hiding in the corner
when apparitions
I’m screaming in the closet
when they are in a trance.
I’m the jumpy passenger
on the hall of horrors train.
I’m the lunatic
in the asylum
when everyone goes insane!
I don’t do well with skeletons
or the living dead,
on Halloween, you’ll find me snuggled in my bed….

And when the monsters party
and shriek through the house
I’m just here for the candy
or something


Posted in Beauty

Silent Sunday

“Heaven is under our feet as well as over our heads.”
― Henry David Thoreau, Walden


Is this the splendor of heaven
I see,
where green pastures
reside in reveries,
and pearly skies
kiss tawny dunes
and seagulls glide
on still afternoons?

Will moments like this
be held in time,
to gaze on the bounty of earth sublime,
and if an ache
exists in me
I’ll set my feet
on sage green fields,
where wild geese call out to their mates,
in ceremonies of lavish grace…


Posted in Breathing under water

In dark Forests…

“When you are standing in that forest of sorrow, you cannot imagine that you could ever find your way to a better place. But if someone can assure you that they themselves have stood in that same place and now have moved on, sometimes this will bring hope”― Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love


In dark forests
of sadness,
I knelt down and prayed.
Every little disturbance
had made me feel afraid.

I’d lost my footing on pathways of despair,
the devastation,
was more than I could bear!

The mist was gathering,
I was discouraged and alone,
and in the murky twilight
I felt totally exposed.

Darkness converged,
and strange sounds could be heard,
in eerie aspects
everything grew blurred…,

Then those who’d been before me
acknowledged my fear,
and with their reassurance
the pathway
became clear…


Posted in signs

Joy and sorrow

“When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.”
― Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

pixabay swallows

Two swallows perched
my heart skipped a beat
and with an effortless memo
they forwarded this tweet

“That just as the tide turns
and ebbs and flows
in the twinkle of an eye
heaven bestows
a change of perspective through God’s wondrous gifts,
and even in deep sorrow
joy still exists….”

Sadly I couldn’t get a clear shot but thanks to Pixabay I found this wonderful image!

Posted in Breathing under water

I wish it was a dream…

“Your memory feels like home to me.
So whenever my mind wanders, it always finds it’s way back to you.”
― Ranata Suzuki

it was all a dream

Our beloved cat Ziggy-stardust was killed by a speeding car…
We are in disbelief right now

Sometimes late at night
I feel the intensity of grief,
as another star falls from the skies
and I’m transfixed
by the torment of darkness.

The unbearable tragedy of being
is all around me
spreading me out
into relentless weariness
and I’m dust
scattered and lost

I can hardly hold my balance
as a lamentable ache
my memories.
A Longing
for one last touch
to feel you against me
your soft fragrance of life
wrapping me
in affection.

The groundlessness of sorrow
swallows me whole
my burnt flesh still tender from mourning.
I no longer hold onto faith
I am belief now,
belief in the tangible presence of unceasing love.
that leaves an impression
on my heart
and mind
a knowledge
that I’m not alone
in seas of terrible uncertainty.

and as the sun rises again on this dreadful heartache
I can hear the early birds
“love never dies”


Posted in grief


If I were to tattoo myself with all the losses along the way
I would be a magnificent creation of art
and the beauty of souls
who have touched this skin
would be a remembrance 
of the incredible depths of love
penetrating my heart
in gratitude
of lives once lived
as each and every one
enlivens my being
with glorious memories…