A dark night of the soul

“This deepening of love is the real purpose of the dark night of the soul. The dark night helps us become who we are created to be: lovers of God and one another.”
Gerald G. May, The Dark Night of the Soul

once in limbo

Living life in slow motion
fast forward through the pain.
In my marrow self destruction
will hysteria please refrain!
Buried in fields of absolution
scarecrows feasting on my bones.
Life forcefully spins around me
throttling a life that once I owned.

At a point my breath is raindrops
dedicated to lucid beings.
I will call; to bring You closer,
no premonition in these dreams!
Dive, oh dive into fate’s oblivion
plunge the seas of forgetfulness.
Brilliant stars cannot awaken
from this terror of harmfulness.

Into tranquil elements guide me
when my soul loses capacity.
Floating above soul’s intuition
learn the dance of adversity.

I won’t cling to terminal insanity
though the abyss calls me to rest.
Darkness making me its love child,
release me from this prisons quest.
A jailer of my mind’s remembrance
holding on with clenched fists.
Tearing flesh and bones apart
in the darkness, grief persists.

Sojourning in a desert nation
feeding off my life’s remains.
Prairie dogs eat my sinews
bile of discontent, I am sustained.

Lead me back to living waters
in my blindness I have fled.
Tears fall softly on my shadow
a living hell of much regret.
Cover me with reeds of silence,
burn my embers till I’m bright.
If I’m lost, may I be found again
search I will, for heaven’s light

Death has swallowed all direction
of this tired, indecent life.
Into living waters drench me
divine thankfulness, may I recite.

I have tossed and turned with memories
of my sacred life undone.
The past followed down empty hallways
hollow creatures chanting songs.
Bitter hope, my life’s expectancy
may despair flee to naught.
Does this life have hope in purpose
or should I beg You snuff me out?

This ache, this scream within me
won’t be silenced anymore,
and my doubts are firmly planted
in locations my soul abhors!

Circumstances can change to meaning
so that peace may know my name.
Take my wounds and make them holy
at Your gates I beg in shame.
My heart of stone bears resemblance
to a lower form survived.
Rip it out and make it flesh again
that compassion is revived.

Wings will make my mortal soul to fly
from this disturbed, unholy place.
Gather me up, into belonging
to my rightful home embraced.
Though the future hangs in balance
send amnesia to my dreams.
Heavenly beings are out there waiting
above the mists, on glory’s stream.

May I drink  of Angel nectar,
till I’m filled and thirst no more.
Worship leaps within my body
mercies fields where abundance soars.

Will  You temper me with kindness
serenade me with Creation songs.
Force fields of Your love protect me
as I gather into Earthly throngs!

©2017

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